color my eyes red---open

[*ZUI NIXON PHOENIX!]

- - - - - - ’cause our lives are

[/font]

going up in flames ! - - - - - -[/font][/center]

"Rent a hotel" Zui looked daringly at her brother. Did he really think it was a good idea to leave her in a hotel...by herself? At a time like this. AT THIS TIME!? Great, now she was yelling in her head. It was enough that she was hearing voices but now she was talking to herself into her own head. Was that bad? She thought hearing voices was bad? Yeah, that was bad. Very bad. Fuck, she was going insane. Someone call the fucking mental hospital. Not like she wasn't suppose to be there already. Fuck, the girl belonged there. So, where was Zui headed now with her new laptop and guitar? The hotel. She checked in and headed up to her room, throwing the door closed and setting everything on the bed. She tossed her keys to the side. Everything was shit. She was shit. Well, not many believed that. Zui was shit. She believed it so much. She lied to her siblings about her parents death, she lied to them about James. She was a fucking liar and good at it. Zui sighed and took off her coat, throwing it on the floor and kicking off the boots. She fell face first down on the bed, her arms spread out. Her face buried into the pillow as she moved her arms to hug it to her. She turned to her side and stared at the wall. Getting up she opened the bag she had brought and grabbed the large bottle of jack. She unscrewed the cap and sniffed it, the strong smell burned her nose as she tipped her head back and took a sip, screwing the cap back on she took the bottle and her brand new guitar and laid them on the bed as she started taking off her clothes .

She walked into her own bathroom and flipped the switch, opening the shower curtain and turning on the water. It had to be hot or else she would of never gotten into it in the first place. She knew if she didn’t take a shower, the sticky feeling of sweat would stick to her all day. That was one of the problems with her she woke up in a chilled sweat that had chills running down her spine. Cold sweats were the worse. It felt like she was being dumped in ice or her blood was so cold it couldn’t help but produce cold sweat. Honestly, she wasn’t even sure if she was making sense. She hoped she was, or else she would be going crazy. As the room steamed up with hot steam the mirror clouded up, she stared at her body, as the room got hotter, you would think she’d want to avoid heat but she knew what was real life and what wasn’t. The scars. That marked her pale were very purplish red. They showed clearly unlike some of the other scars. They started from her ribcage down to her hipbones. A small tattoo of a cupcake and a heart covered some but not all of them. When asked of those scars Zui simple replied that she had fallen down the stairs when she was young. Lies, they were from crashing the car and James. The...He...liked knives and she was his toy. He tasted out his new knives on her, carving into her skin. That was all she was good for right? For someone to carve into her skin. Burning, the cut burned. She had no idea why she let him do it. But he did. He made her believe that he loved her. That he always did despite putting her in pain and then it happened. The car crash. She let her finger trace down some of them, trailing along the lines. She shivered, like they still hurt. Like they were still sore.

Zui felt the water and concluded that it was a good amount of temperature. Stepping in the boiling water hit her bare skin. Instantly, any muscles that were tense relaxed and suddenly she was feeling better. A happy sigh left her as she started running the soap over her skin.

Creating lather and the sticky sweaty feeling finally going away as she rinsed it off under the water. She grabbed the shampoo and poured some into her hand, rubbing her head and pulling back her hands as she stuck her head under the water and washed it away then repeating the step over again and then using conditioner, which left her hair hanging straight and smooth. She always loved what conditioner did to her hair. After a few finishing touches to her daily shower she stepped out and shivered a little from the cold hair that hit her body and created small goose bumps that ran up her arms. She grabbed the towel from the rack and wrapped it around her. She didn’t know where the hell she got them but they were extremely soft and really, really, really warm. After drying off she went back in her room, wrapping the towel around her head and started pulling on her clothes, first came the underwear and bra, then her shirt which laid against her body, hugging her well, what was there of her curves and then her jeans which clung to her thin legs. Zui slipped on her shoes and went back into her bathroom, running a brush through her brown hair as she put some product in it so it didn’t look like a complete frizz disaster.

Now that she was clean she walked back into the main part of the hotel room, unscrewing the cap of Jack and taking long long gulps, it burned her throat as she moved the bottle from her lips and grabbed her guitar, pulling it onto her lap and grabbing a pick. She started playing, just anything as she stopped in between songs to sip on the jack. As soon as she was done with the fifth song the floor was spinning and Zui stood up, using the wall as support. She stumbled, running a hand through her hair and finishing off the jack, looking for another one. After finding a beer she walked outside onto the first floor patio. Cracking it open and collapsing in a chair, opening it and taking a sip. Fuck, she was going to die of alcohol posioning. Zui was losing her mind. She knew it. She couldn't handle anything. Christmas, it just reminded her of everything. She leaned forward and took a sip from the beer. Her vision blurring as she hugged her knees from her chest. "Jesus James. Do you even know what the fuck you're doing to me?" She wanted to scream it at him instead of talking to thin air. She knew that wasn't going to happen unless she died or somehow people figured out how to bring others to life. She gulped down the rest of the beer and threw the bottle out. This was her, drinking herself out of a depression. Tomorrow's hangover would be lovely.

[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/blockquote]as we watch[/font][/size][/i]
L I K E- -I T ’ S- -A- -M O V I E[/font]

STATUS, finished
TAGGED, open
WORDS, 1012
MUSE, “red alert,” falling in reverse.
NOTES, blah.[/size][/color]

i come alive with you

[/font][/size][/i]
whadduuup! well, this template was made by monica !
at caution to the wind. if you take off this credit then i
won’t hesitate to send my pack of mutant ninja turtles
to attack you with blunt sporks :3 either that or i’ll go
all anikan skywalker on your ass. lyrics from the song
“legends” by madina lake. check them out, they=love.[/font][/right][/color]

[*STEELE LEVI WILSON!]

After a long day's work at the photo shoot, it was nice to get home and sit by the television with beer in one hand and the remote in the other. Not many days since the start of the tour has Steele had the chance to just relax for one night. Taking a sip from the beer, he was surprised at how revolting the taste was. It has been awhile since Steele had beer, probably about nine months, he had forgotten the bitter taste of it. The last time he had anything to drink, he had wound up in a hospital from alcohol poisoning, so for awhile he was afraid to drink anything stronger than church wine. He took another sip of the drink, forcing himself to swallow instead of spitting it back up. He did that for a few more sips until he was immune to the nausea of the taste. Laying on the couch, Steele's head was titled to the side, facing the television. He watched the picture, but nothing was processing in his brain. Was the beer already working? Impossible. Steele used to drink about twice his weight in alcohol, which came no surprise to his friends when he wound up in the hospital, but it would take a long time for the alcohol to start affecting his brain. Usually when he drank, it would only cause him partial impairment of his words, thus causing him to slur.

While he watched the screen, he finished off his beer, and was working on a second one, when he heard his phone go off. He moaned and reluctantly got up to see what it was. He grabbed his phone off from the kitchen counter and flipped it up to his ear. "Hello?" he said, waiting for a response. He stood there for several second with his phone up to his ear before he looked at the screen again and noticed that it was a text message from Phineas. 'Hey Steele, sorry to bother you, but can you check on Zui at the hotel, the key is on the counter. Thanks buddy' He read through the text three times before he caught on to the message. Fuck, Steele thought as he looked at the counter to find the key laying the counter, just like the message had said. Steele didn't mind checking on Zui at the hotel, he just wished Phineas could have asked him before Steele got all the way home because now that he was home, he didn't want to do anything. Steele pushed the reply button, sending his best friend back "Sure thing." Slipping the phone and keys into his pocket and downing the last of his beer Steele grabbed his coat and keys and walked out the door. He locked it behind him, since he knew that it might be awhile before someone got home, since everyone was out partying like usual. Steele hopped into his car and drove off, trying to concentrate on the road.

Driving while drunk was illegal, but Steele was not affected by the beer just yet. He still had plenty of time to get to Zui's hotel room before worrying about the alcohol, the only problem was driving back after he was done. Maybe Zui would offer to drive him back, since she would most likely be the sober one there. Hitting every green light on the street, Steele felt lucky as he pulled into a parking spot in front of the hotel that Zui was staying out. He wondered why Zui was in a hotel instead of back on the bus, that kind of worried him, but he knew he would get answers soon enough. He checked the number on the key to find the room and walked down the hall, looking for the corresponding number on the door. He walked down pretty far and stopped when he heard a familiar voice speak to him. He turned around, looking for the source and then looked straight head to see Zui sitting just outside the hotel room. "Who's James and what is he doing to you?" He questioned, noticing she looked a little upset and drunk.

Though the lighting was horrible, Steele knew that she was upset about something. Other than that, she seemed fine, but since she was Phineas' sister and a very close friend to Steele, he knew it was his job to make her feel better. "Hey Zui, your brother uh," Steele paused to clear his throat, noticing that he was slurring a bit, "he asked me to uh, to come check on you." Steele replied, trying his best to sound sober, but he knew that Zui could see right past his acting. She was a very smart girl, that was something Steele admired about her at the same time feared, since she was always able to tell when something was up with him, especially when he appeared drunk.here

NOTES NOT THAT GOOD. PROMISE WILL GET BETTER WORDS 819
TAGGED ZUI OUTFIT LOOK AT PICTURE
CREDIT BY HEY BAYBAY !? AT CAUTION !

[*ZUI NIXON PHOENIX!]

- - - - - - ’cause our lives are

[/font]

going up in flames ! - - - - - -[/font][/center]

Zui...was not in the best state of mind. Her vision was quite blurring where she needed to be clear because, Zui was a clutz already. Walking would prove to be so difficult that she could barely get up. She stayed rooted in her seat as her phone vibrated. Flipping it open she groaned loudly and chucked the damn thing on to the bed. Holy shit, she was just so drunk. She never reached the damn bed. She heard it crash on the floor and shrugged. Zui was careless when drunk and the probability of her phone breaking was big but she didn't care now. Probably when she sobered up she would. Fuck, that voice was back. " You're so worthless ZooZoo bird." Zui, losing her min already grumbled as she got up to get another beer and sat down. Fuck those fucking voices. God, she could feel herself getting worked up. What did that message say again? Steele was coming to check on you? Who the fuck was it from? Oh yeah. Her brother. Phineas, what a funny name Phineas. Who the fuck named their kids Phineas, River and Zui. Those were the most fucking weirdest names ever. PHINEAS HOLY SHIT. Now, Zui couldn't stop laughing. God damn she had lost it. The brunette started drinking the beer again. She hated the fucking feeling of getting seriously wasted, but she really really needed this. She hated it but she had to do it so she felt better about this fucking holiday. She couldn't help but remember all the things he did to her. To make her suffer only because she believed every fucking thing he said. She was a fucking idiot and knew it. Fuck, Zui was a idiot and she couldn't handle it. Drinking seemed the only way that she could...feel normal at least? He didn't speak that much when she was drunk, well to her.



Of course, she never heard the door open nor did she know anyways was there. So, when she heard the voice, Zui jumped eight feet in the air and spilled her beer. "SHIT COCK SUCKING MOTHER FUCKING" She exclaimed as she stood up, finishing all the beer. She had to hold on to the wall to keep herself right side up. She held onto for dear life as the floor spun below her. She couldn't take it anymore as she sat down on the floor. Her head buried into her hands as she looked up at Steele, she had to refocus for a moment but then she knew who he was. "Y-you...don't need to know....He's HORRIBLE! He was my best friend and he hurt...me. " She shook her head continuously as the voice in her head started up again. " You earned that all by yourself you piece of shit." Holding her head Zui curled herself up. "Shut up." She muttered as she grabbed at the roots of her hair, running her hand through the damp mess. She looked up at Steele again and sighed. Her hand running through her hair again and again, she felt like it was knotted together when it wasn't. "GET THE FUCK UP" She couldn't and she didn't know why it commanded her to. She closed her eyes again and shut the voice out. Her mind...fuzzy and everything. She shouldn't be drinking. God, tomorrow morning is going to be shit when she woke up. Getting up, Zui sighed and pulled another beer out of her bag and held it up to Steele. "Want one?" She mumbled as she leaned against the wall. She felt better now that the voice went away. She couldn't handle sitting down, she felt like she would fall asleep if she did and she wanted to be awake. Suddenly her emotions spiked and she felt happy. Zui nodded her head as he told her about Phineas sending him to check on her.

That's just like Phin, to worry about her. Her brother and sister were worried about her so much. She couldn't barely give a shit right now."He sent me a text. STEELEYYYY I WROTE FIVE NEW SONGS" She said as she bounced over to him. Now that she was somewhat steady on her own feet she could walk. "Are you drunk? You seem drunk? DID YOU DRIVE HERE DRUNK. YOU DON'T DO THAT STEELEY." She was squealing now. Her emotions changed....almost rapidly when she was drunk. A smile pressed against her lips as she played with her hair again. With that Zui wrapped her arms around her band's photographer. She needed to hug someone or else she'd end up hugging the pillow. Zui was a hugger when she was drunk. Hugs for anyone and everyone. It was actually scary since she rarely gave out hugs sober. "Steeley I'm so glad your hear. I need to hug someone...the chair doesn't like me anymore...I think I broke it to many times." She mumbled like a little girl, her words slurring. Yep, this was why her brother and sister never let her drink so much.

[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/blockquote]as we watch[/font][/size][/i]
L I K E- -I T ’ S- -A- -M O V I E[/font]

STATUS, finished
TAGGED, steele
WORDS, 837
MUSE, “red alert,” falling in reverse.
NOTES, blah.[/size][/color]

i come alive with you

[/font][/size][/i]
whadduuup! well, this template was made by monica !
at caution to the wind. if you take off this credit then i
won’t hesitate to send my pack of mutant ninja turtles
to attack you with blunt sporks :3 either that or i’ll go
all anikan skywalker on your ass. lyrics from the song
“legends” by madina lake. check them out, they=love.[/font][/right][/color]

[*STEELE LEVI WILSON!]

Steele usually wouldn't barge into the hotel, just because the door said the number he was looking for didn't mean that this was the right room. For all Steele knew, he could have barged into someone else's room, thinking that the number read what he was looking for it to read. But to his relief, he found Zui, and boy he was glad to see her. Not glad to hear what she had told him, it made him want to punch the wall because he was so angry. Phineas had never told him about a James who used to beat his sister, those details Steele knew Phineas wouldn't forget to tell him, so he came to the conclusion that Phineas must not know about this guy, which made Steele even more furious. He wasn't sure if he should tell Phineas or keep it a secret. He WAS her best friend, that's what she said right? God, Steele couldn't remember. Did that mean he was dead or not her friend anymore. Good, otherwise Steele would kick the guy's ass for hurting Zui. Steele always had a soft spot for Zui, he wasn't sure if it was because she was the sister of his best friend or if she was a girl or not, but he didn't even care for the girls he's dated as much as he cared for Zui. He didn't care for her romantically, well, mostly. He knew he shouldn't like her, especially since his allegiance is Phineas first, and it might cause drama that Steele didn't want to deal with. But even all that negativity towards pursuing this small crush, he could never forget about it when he was with her.

He looked alarmed when he noticed she had been drinking too. Shit, Steele thought. Since she was his close friend and the sister of his best friend, Steele had somewhat of a brotherly figure to her. He frowned, not liking to see her already drunk and trying to drink some more, but she might call him a hypocrite for cutting her off. "Where is this boy. I outta teach him a lesson or two." Steele replied, clenching his hand into a fist. He was about to beat this kid up. Steele never acted violent, this was the alcohol speaking, Steele was too much of a wuss to fight, but if someone was hurting one of his friends, that wouldn't stop him from trying. He looked at her, alarmed when she said shut up. Was she talking to him or someone else? "I'm sorry, I just..." Steele said but stopped. He wasn't sorry for speaking, he meant every word of it. No one hurts his friends. "This boy.. did he ever hit you?" Steele asked, surprised that he was able to hold a conversation without forgetting what they were talking about. Steele took the beer she offered, though he really didn't want to, it was almost as if he couldn't stop himself. He took the beer from her small hands and opened it, thrusting it to his mouth without even thinking about it. Why was he still doing this? He knew he had to be sober enough to drive home, why was he drinking more alcohol? Especially beer. Steele hated beer! It was disgusting, he forced himself to swallow yet again. Why was he being so stupid in front of her. This was not what he went here for. Phineas would probably kick Steele in the nuts for drinking with his sister instead of doing his job. Maybe Phineas doesn't have to know about this, thought Steele, as he took another sip of beer down his throat and swallowed hard. Just like I'll keep her secret about the guy, she can keep mine about drinking with her.

"Wow five?" Steele said, trying to sound impressed. He really was, but he was never a hyper drunk, he was more of a horny drunk. "I'd love to hear them sometime." He learned to ignore the slur to his sentences and to accept him, after all, the cat was out of the bag, there was no use trying to cover himself up now. Besides, maybe if Steele was lucky enough, Zui would forget that he was ever over here in the morning. "No, I'm not drunk. I drove over here sober. Nothing happened to me, see?" Steele smiled. What was wrong with a little white lie? Besides, he wasn't technically lying, he wasn't drunk when he was driving, he could see the road perfectly. Sometimes he wondered if the whole drinking and driving was just a myth, he had never been pulled over or got into a car wreck while he was driving after a couple of beers. "It'll take more than a couple of beers to get me drunk!" He exclaimed proudly, taking a sip of the beer she had handed to him earlier. He might as well stay here for awhile to watch over her. As long as he was there, Phineas had nothing to worry about. Steele was a bit surprised as she wrapped her arms around him. After a few seconds of hesitation, he wrapped his back around hers and held on. It had been awhile since he's had any affection from anyone, so her hug felt incredible. He tried to ignore the fact that she was drunk off her ass and they probably looked really ridiculous. Steele could vaguely remember the last time he actually got a hug like this from Zui, it must have been a really long time. Steele knew Zui was never quite an affectionate person, and he respected that, but he liked this side of Zui as well. "Oh, well don't you worry. I still like you." Steele said, hugging her a bit tighter to make her feel better. Steele was always the crowd pleaser. He always catered to those around him, giving them what he knew they wanted, whether it was something simple like a hug or more, Steele didn't mind one bit. What made him happy was to see the faces of his friends happy when he does something to them or for them.

NOTES BLAHWORDS 1024
TAGGED ZUI OUTFIT LOOK AT PICTURE
CREDIT BY HEY BAYBAY !? AT CAUTION !

[*ZUI NIXON PHOENIX!]

- - - - - - ’cause our lives are

[/font]

going up in flames ! - - - - - -[/font][/center]

Zui was never that type to crush on someone, unless you threw Trey into the mix but that was the only guy who she was seriously crushing on. That was about it though. Random hook ups were never her thing considering she hasn't even had sex yet or kissed anyone. Which some people thought it was hard to believe. That Zui Phoenix never kissed anyone. Which was funny because she was pretty sure that her whole life she spent convinced that someone loved her....although he only hurt her and didn't kill her...Well, he did try to that one day but she got to him before he did. Well, he kinda did considering the scars that marked her body. "You were just a stupid doll" Fuck that stupid voice. She sighed lightly, knowing it was quite useless to block out the voice. It hadn't worked for a couple years she wasn't sure what made her think it would work now, if she was drunk or not. Right now, her mind wasn't doing so good at processing thoughts. She couldn't think of a time when she was drunk and...it was good at processing any thoughts. Goddamnit. Why couldn't she think? Think Zui, think. She felt like she was talking to herself which she was. Okay, maybe if she just cleared her mind, her thoughts would be straightened out. She knew that if Phineas trusted anyone to check on her it would be Steele. He was best friends with her brother and she was close to him. Plus, she knew that Hayden was probably off doing something and River was with Thack...So yeah, this was likely. Right? Right Zui.

Zui...Never spoke about what James had did to her and right now she looked up at Steele. His words went through her head as she stood there. "He's dead...He died today...not today but on Christmas...Of a car crash...I causes it. I got hurt too." She mumbled as she sighed, the words were already more slurred than they should be as she took several more sips of beer, hopefully they kept the voice away and the pain away. She was suppose to die with him. " Thanks for killing me" Zui did all she could to keep herself from talking to herself. She didn't want to seem weird in front of Steele...even though that wasn't that hard. Her head snapped up as he asked the question if James ever hurt her, standing up Zui nodded her head slowly and lifted up her shirt to expose the long scars on the side.."He use..to like...I forget." She closed her eyes for a moment. "Like...he called me a doll...that could get cut up...and put back together...he called me Sally and that if I ever told anyone he would kill me." She mumbled as she opened her eyes. She let her shirt fall back on her thin frame as she sighed. "He's the little voice inside of my head that tells me things...Things I hate hearing" She muttered as she tapped the side of her head with her pointer finger. "It never seems to shut up though..." She knew that if she was sober she wouldn't even start us this conversation. She was very honest and willing to admit anything when she was drunk, like her own truth test. "He....stabbed my side the night he got killed....That..big one right there...Rivvy and Phinny thought it was the glass....silly people...I didn't tell them though...I thought he was alive and would still kill me or something....I don't....know..Maybe I'm crazy. I'm pretty sure I'm crazy. I'm hearing voices now right? I muse be insane...Yeah. I'm insane." By now her voice was small and she was finished talking about it. She didn't want to anymore as she closed her eyes. "Steeley don't tell them...They can't know..." She told him as she looked at him. She wouldn't remember talking about this in the morning hopefully, that was a hopefully. She knew if Steele remembered any of this he would definietly tell her brother and sister. They would know and then she would have to go to a hospital. Maybe it was just schizophrenia. People with schizophrenia heard voices...Maybe she just had a disorder. That sounded logical one out of her and her siblings had to be fucked up and she seemed to be doing a good job so far.



Zui's attention snapped back when he started talking about the songs. She nodded her head happily and grinned. "Yes, you know that Storm girl I hate? Well, I wrote them all about her. Just like the one we have. I hate her Steeley. She makes the voice come back even stronger when she calls me a stupid little girl..and teases me because...she's a whore....I've never kissed anyone and she calls me someone weird ass name. Fucking bitch. I could fuck her up in a second I did actually. Phinny had to hold me back from bashing her face in. Am I really that bad Steeley? I'm a psycho bitch? She just didn't shut up and I couldn't take it. I punched her hard..." Zui started talking and the words just didn't stop coming out. She shut up though after her little speech, forgetting all about Steele and drunk driving. "Mkay, well...I drank a whole bottle of jack....I don't think that's good but I don't care. She said as she bit down on her lower lip and finished off the beer. She went to get another one and popped the cap open, taking another sip and setting it on the counter. She wondered why she was such a lovable drunk? Was it because it was the opposite of her sober personality. It felt good when he hugged her back, Zui buried her head into his shoulder. She smiled as he told her he still liked him. "That's good. At least you like me....." She looked up at him and smiled. "I mean....I don't think many people like me...I think it's because...I mean...yeah, I'm mean." She said as she bit down on her lower lip so her words came out..odd. She sighed and rest her head against her chest. "Steeley...Do you think I'm nice?" She asked him as she chewed on the inside of her lip.

[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/blockquote]as we watch[/font][/size][/i]
L I K E- -I T ’ S- -A- -M O V I E[/font]

STATUS, finished
TAGGED, steele
WORDS, 1036
MUSE, “red alert,” falling in reverse.
NOTES, blah.[/size][/color]

i come alive with you

[/font][/size][/i]
whadduuup! well, this template was made by monica !
at caution to the wind. if you take off this credit then i
won’t hesitate to send my pack of mutant ninja turtles
to attack you with blunt sporks :3 either that or i’ll go
all anikan skywalker on your ass. lyrics from the song
“legends” by madina lake. check them out, they=love.[/font][/right][/color]

[*STEELE LEVI WILSON!]

It never occurred to Steele at how really beautiful Zui was. He wasn't sure if it was the alcohol in his veins that were making him see her look ten times better than usual or if he had never took the time to look at her closely. She was drop dead gorgeous, he had to admit. Hell, their whole family had good genes, genes that Steele was jealous of. Her brother, damn that boy was good looking, but Steele knew his boundaries, and he also knew he would never think about dating him. As for his sisters, Steele was a bit iffy on them. He was holding Zui in his arms, resisting the temptations of kissing her. He knew the troubles of getting intimate with his best friend's sister, and that if, for any circumstances that might happen, he knew he needed to run it by Phineas beforehand, he just wasn't the type to go behind people's backs, especially a close friend's back. No, he was not going to turn into everyone else at the tour, he was her friend, that was it. Who cares how devilishly good looking she was, or how long it had been since Steele had an actual liking to another girl. Sure he had one night stands every once in awhile, but every guys needs their fix and the girls were slutty enough. Zui on the other hand, was not a slut, it was pretty obvious that she had never kissed a boy, let alone have sex with someone. Steele wasn't thinking of sex, though it would be the perfect time, he was not going to take advantage of her while she was intoxicated like he usually did with the other girls. She meant more to him than some silly lay, that was for sure. But maybe a kiss wouldn't be that bad, thought Steele.

Snap out of it, she's pretty much your sister that's gross. Steele could hear himself talking out of it, though the temptation lingered there. Maybe he could use it to shut her up, she was talking a sure lot, things that Steele couldn't comprehend, or tried not to comprehend. Steele's eyes got bug eyed as she told him her story. He couldn't believe his ears, was this all true. He knew while driving around Christmas day he heard about a car crash killing someone, and wounding the other, but he never thought it was someone close. This was a big town after all, the chance of him knowing one out of two in the car was very slim, and yet as Zui lifted her shirt to show him, the scar was there, present as day. The scars were real, she had to be telling the truth. Even while intoxicated, it seemed as though the girl was spilling her deepest, darkest secret to him. He wished he could remember it in the morning, otherwise it might be never he got to hear it again. "Why didn't you ever tell me?" Steele asked, worried. "I could have made sure he was sent to jail before he could ever lay a hand on you again." Steele couldn't believe how serious their conversation had turned into. His eyes brought instantly back up to that beautiful face of hers as she spoke again. "What kind of things does he tell you?" Steele asked, bringing his hands up to her immaculate cheek bone, and lightly touching them, as if he were holding it in place for a kiss, but he didn't. "You're not crazy. A little messed up, probably traumatized, but not crazy. Don't worry, they're just voices, he won't ever hurt you again, nor will anyone else, I won't allow it." Steele said, dropping down his hand and grabbing hold of hers, squeezing them for reassurance. "I won't tell them, I promise, it'll be our little secret." Steele said, he knew that Phineas and River had a right to know the truth, but it was far worse him telling them than her, knowing Phineas, he would flip a cow if he found out. Steele couldn't help but feel a bit sad for her, and himself for what had happened. This boy who had hurt her, really messed up her noggin, and all Steele could do was sit there and listen to it. "Did you ever go to the hospital about... the voices?" Steele asked, hesitating a bit in the middle of his sentence.

Oh boy, did Steele remember that Storm girl. Though he was completely intoxicated, he remembered how much Zui despised Storm. Girls were just so vicious, which is why sometimes it was nice to find a nice gentlemen to date for awhile. "There, there. You're not psycho bitch. You are sweet and you don't need people like that influencing your brain. You are far from a whore, believe me, I've met a few who are much worse than you." Then Steele heard her talking about finishing a whole bottle of jack, and she was still downing the beer. "Zui, I think you should stop for tonight. You need to give your system a little time to take in the alcohol." Steele said as he went in to reach the beer she had just set down on the counter. "We don't want you to go to the hospital, now. You're brother would kill me if he saw how much I had let you drink." Steele smiled as Zui buried her head into his shoulder. It felt good that she trusted him enough to tell him. He knew that some of the truth was because of the alcohol, but apart of him could see how much she was needing to tell someone, anyone who she knew could make sure that wouldn't go off and tell her brother or sister. Though Steele felt bad, now knowing a secret he could not tell Phineas, he knew it was going to be hard to keep it from him, since Steele told Phineas everything, even the small little details about his day. He was just going to have to watch what he says around her brother. It couldn't be that hard, she had been able to do it for, from what Steele could tell, a long time, and she was his sister. Steele looked at her when she asked if she were nice. He hugged her again and said, "Of course you are. I've never met anyone who's nicer than you." He tightly wrapped his arms around her, then released. He looked at her for a few long seconds, right into her eyes. His lips quivered. Just one kiss, he thought, just one kiss wouldn't hurt, Zui needs me now, she needs to know I'm here for her. What in the world was he thinking? Steele didn't even know. He never before wanted to kiss Zui as much as he did now. He had to resist though, knowing from previous experiences that it never was just one kiss. After one was two, three, maybe even four, until they were on the bed, taking clothes off. But maybe this time it will be just one kiss. Still looking at Zui, realizing how innocent she looked, Steele leaned in, pressing his lips against hers.

NOTES BLAHWORDS 1202
TAGGED ZUI OUTFIT LOOK AT PICTURE
CREDIT BY HEY BAYBAY !? AT CAUTION !

[*ZUI NIXON PHOENIX!]

- - - - - - ’cause our lives are

[/font]

going up in flames ! - - - - - -[/font][/center]

Whenever Zui got her mind back straight she looked up at Steele. Damn it....what was going on. There was a attraction to him? No no no no no no no. She couldn't help but repeat no in her own head at about five more million times. Sure, he was cute...okay cute was a underestimate of how good looking he was good. NO ZUI NO NO NO. There went the word no going off in her head again. Stop it, shut up mind. Shhh, it nothing. Right, it was nothing? Zui...wasn't exactly the type to jump into anything. Hell, she hasn't even done anything with a guy except cuddle and that never ended up in anything because well, Zui was waiting...for what? She didn't know herself. She knew her brother and sister were already off in that world where....they were adults and slept with people. Funny, how she was the oldest and she still hadn't lost that big thing that her sister and her gushed over when she first did, that was weird....she felt very scared that her sister had did it before her and she was still stuck trying to figure out what the fuck love was and if it was real or meant for her in anyway.She was pretty sure what she had with James wasn't love it was just....her being stupid and gullible. She was like that when she was with him, stupid. Completely and utterly stupid. After that she got her mind back...but it wasn't going half as well as she wanted it to go. She knew her brother and sister would freak out if they found out that she was thinking about leaving the band. She thought it over a million times before making up her mind that she wasn't going to. It would hurt them to much and the band, plus what else was she good for? Certainly not anything else but...what she was doing before. Sure, she could find a new band but knowing her it would be to hard for her to do even that since she was so use to being in a band with people she loved and if you didn't know Zui, she was hard to live with. Her temper tantrums would normally fuck things up for people and she knew she did that well with ease. Whether it meant that she could fuck them up psychically or mentally.She was pretty damn good at both with the right kind of people.

Zui wished she wasn't drunk so she would just shut the fuck up. This would be way past her comfort point about talking about her past. Heck, the only person she ever got this deep was with Amanda and that was because she saw the long scar on her side that weren't like the other scars and somehow she was good at telling how old they were, knowing that they all seem to not look like they came from glass, they were to straight and perfect for glass from a car crash to do it. She was forced to spill them out and it felt good to tell someone a secret she had been hiding but since then she had said nothing about it to anyone. She knew that her brother and sister told them never to release her name in the paper along with James...But they did that anyways. Only the people really close to her that knew her then knew that she was caught up in the accident and knew that she was one of those people who had gotten hurt and almost killed. It was just the two of them that night. The whole plan was screwed up. Poor planning she had guessed but the cops were so fast, she thought she would of been finished by then. Stupid Hippocratic oath. She looked down at her feet as he spoke, not sure what to say. She never told anyone right? She never knew why. "I w-was scared. That he would hurt someone close to me....That I would lose another person that I cared about..." She spoke as she looked up at him, her dark brown eyes watering. No, she couldn't cry. Zui wasn't a crier...ever. She barely did it. Only on a occasion would she break down, like waking from nightmares or memories or anything else that really really upset her. His light touches distracted her mind but as soon as he spoke again and his hand went to her's...She didn't want to tell him. Her mouth seemed permanently closed until she opened it. "Things...Like...I'm completely...worthless. I'm not good for anything. I'm a stupid little girl. That....I'm...broken. Stupid shit that I shouldn't listen to but I do." She mumbled as she chewed down on her lower lip. She couldn't stop, it was helping her calm her nerves as she swallowed down the lump in her throat. She was pretty happy when he told her that this would be their secret. Yes, their secret. That was good. Phinny and Rivvy couldn't know of this. Zui picked her up up and looked at him, the look on her face said that she never said anything about her voices to the hospital. " N-n-no I don't want them to hurt me...I hate hospitals. H-he use to say that they would do the same thing that he did to me. I didn't want that to happen." She knew he must of thought she was insane. She would think it too, that she was just a stupid girl who believed all his lies.

Zui...seemed to have a problem with every girl except for her sister and Amanda now or days. Maybe it was because she always got along with boys more than chicks. That or chicks were just fucking bitches and didn't understand anything. Yeah, she was pretty sure that was it. But, still. She really did have a problem with humanity...sometimes she felt like she could just give up on the whole human race and let them die....and do nothing to save them. If there was a higher being then she hated to have their job. The nineteen year old pouted as he took away her beer. She...wanted that badly. She felt like it kept her from going insane. A low whimper left Zui's mouth as she went to go grab it back from Steele. A glare stuck on her features as she pulled her arm back when he mentioned hospital and Phineas. With a groan she sighed. "Okay." She muttered as she closed her eyes for a moment. He felt good and warm. During her drunken stupor she started wondering if she...should kiss him. Just to get it over with. She didn't know what she was doing as she looked at him, just looking not moving she couldn't though. Phineas and Steele were like bffs no, they were BFFS. She couldn't do it...But she wanted to so badly. She felt his arms around her again and sighed when he told her she was nice. "That's good" She said as he let go. A wave of need washed over her as she wanted his arms back around her. It was a few seconds of staring at him that she found herself wanted to get closer. Her mind trailed off as she saw him getting closer. Then it happened, his lips were on hers and her brain didn't react. Zui closed her eyes though and...pressed her lips against his a bit harder. That's how it was done right? Yeah...that's what happened. Her arms moved up around his neck and honestly, she had no idea what the hell she was doing.....or if she had any control of the situation.

[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/blockquote]as we watch[/font][/size][/i]
L I K E- -I T ’ S- -A- -M O V I E[/font]

STATUS, finished
TAGGED, steele
WORDS, 1275
MUSE, “red alert,” falling in reverse.
NOTES, blah.[/size][/color]

i come alive with you

[/font][/size][/i]
whadduuup! well, this template was made by monica !
at caution to the wind. if you take off this credit then i
won’t hesitate to send my pack of mutant ninja turtles
to attack you with blunt sporks :3 either that or i’ll go
all anikan skywalker on your ass. lyrics from the song
“legends” by madina lake. check them out, they=love.[/font][/right][/color]

[*STEELE LEVI WILSON!]

A strange new wave of emotions filled Steele. He was quite sure that the alcohol had taken complete control of his brain and it was allowing him to act upon impulse. He tried to concentrate on Zui's words, but he only caught a little bit of it, assuming the rest in his brain. He felt horrible for her, a feeling that made Steele feel worse. Usually he would only look at the outsider's point of view and equally understand both sides, but in this case, there was no other considerable side to think about. He was one hundred percent on her side, anyone that physically hurt someone immediately lost all respect from Steele. He didn't care if the other guy was a saint, he was not holy if he allowed himself to inflict pain upon others. The thought nearly disgusted him as his brain revealed the shocking images from her stomach again in his brain. It made him want to puke out all the toxins in his body until he was sober enough to dig up his grave and really make sure the sun of a bitch was dead. He knew that there was no point in thinking about revenge towards a dead man, that was strictly the alcohol thinking, but he wished there was a way to really show this guy that he meant business. In Steele's opinion, death really was the easy way out. The guy got what he deserved, a death sentence, literally, but Steele wished he could have gotten to him before the accident though. He would never forgive himself for being so blind sided all this time before the accident where Zui was sworn to secrecy, the guy wouldn't have a reason to kill her if someone found out on their own. It was all in the past now, and as Steele got closer to her, he knew that this was what he needed to do to make her feel happy again, show her that there is always someone who will watch over her constantly, making sure that she doesn't give up, and that job Steele took over. The physical attractiveness had nothing to do with it, though it really did come in great help to give her comfort. He wasn't sure if it was because he was trying to comfort her or if it was a little part of him that wanted to kiss her. It could possibly be both, but whatever Steele was feeling now, he didn't want to stop.

Feeling her lips match his, pressing into his face with just as much force brought Steele into the moment. He wrapped his arms around her waist like he had done to a million girls before, but Zui was special. None of the other girls were as close to him as Zui, they were about one tenth as hot as she was, and they had not trusted Steele with the biggest secret they had. Steele felt guilty; guilty because here he was, arms wrapped around his best friend's sister, kissing her like a lover. Steele knew that Phineas would probably think that Steele was using her at her weakest for sex, because he has done it to several women, but no, he really wasn't. Zui was special, it didn't matter how much alcohol the both of them consumed, he was not going to allow himself that opportunity. They were just two friends who happened to be sharing and extremely long kiss. Was that all that bad? It wasn't like either of them were taken or that they were using each other, Steele knew that a little bit inside of him had always wanted to do it, but before he had always ignored it, knowing that sisters of his best friend were off limits. Whilst in the moment, he couldn't help but think about Phineas and what he would think about this. Steele sure as hell wasn't going to tell him unless he really needed to know. Now he was going to keep two deep dark secrets from his friend. Man, this was starting to get complicated. He had kept secrets before, but he had always cracked under pressure, giving in to Phineas' demands. If they were a gay couple, Steele would clearly be the girl in the relationship, so easily taken by his strong words convincing him that he could tell him anything. Damn Phineas and the clever way he got information out of Steele. But this time would be different, there was new circumstances, and no matter what it was bad keeping secrets from friends, but even worse to break promises to others.

His lips pulled away from hers for a second and took a deep breath. He hadn't realized that he was drowning her with his lips until he literally almost drowned himself. He was a bit surprised at how easily she had been able to keep up with him, most girls didn't have such a natural talent as that, and considering she hadn't kissed many guys before, he was impressed. It made him lean back in for more. His hands moved from just around her waist, to on her waist, his fingers wrapping around her tiny torso. He felt as though as he should say something, but what was there to say that wouldn't frighten the mood away. For once, things were calm and she was no longer panicking about telling Steele. He had to shut her up somehow. He knew that keeping things bottled up like that were extremely hard to do and once someone got to talking, it was almost impossible for them to stop. He knew that at any moment she wanted to continue, he would allow her to, uninterrupted, and he would listen. He wished there was more he could do for her to get her to be okay and not so self degrading to herself. She was really an amazing girl, Steele had known that for a long time, but it was her time to believe it to. He brought his right hand up and brushed her hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear. "If you ever want to talk about it again, I'm always here for you. I'm not going anywhere." Steele said softly. "I promise you I will help you through this." he said before leaning in and giving her a soft kiss on the cheek.

NOTES BLAHWORDS 1064
TAGGED ZUI OUTFIT LOOK AT PICTURE
CREDIT BY HEY BAYBAY !? AT CAUTION !

[*ZUI NIXON PHOENIX!]

- - - - - - ’cause our lives are

[/font]

going up in flames ! - - - - - -[/font][/center]

She wasn't really concentrating on what she was saying, she didn't know what the fuck she was saying. Did she want to know what she was saying? No, not really. Honestly, she wasn't having the best night of her life when the memories just kept attacking her. Wishing it would all stop she closed her eyes, hoping it did something. But there was this odd tug in her that drawn her to Steele. Maybe it was because she was drunk and drunk Zui always looked for comfort in someone and she had to or else she would be a nervous wreck. She was a nervous wreck sober well, more like a angry wreck. She wasn't exactly a nervous person really, maybe around certain things that reminded her of the past but that never happened often unless they were in Las Vegas. That only happened once in a while because A; she was either off tour or B; they were there to play a show. Normally, it was in and out because Zui would be out of the state and probably went to stay with Manda at her place. She couldn't be in Vegas. It just caused trouble. She can't remember the last time she set foot there or even near her old home. She often stayed in hotels if she was there, knowing if she stayed hidden maybe, just maybe Jame's friends wouldn't notice her. She didn't want that because she was sure they would do something. That was what she was afraid of. Maybe they wouldn't and leave it alone...But she didn't take any chances and got out of there as soon as she could. If they were still looking for her....to kill her. Then she didn't want to be any where near there. Although, it had a been a year or two...She was pretty sure she wasn't on their list anymore. Who would want to go after her when they knew she could tear them apart if she knew they were coming? No one. Which was pretty good when you were considered to be the tough one. Yeah,she was the 'tough' one. She could take them...She could...without any problems. Her mind shut the thought out of failing as she her attention was redirected to Steele. He was doing a pretty good job at distracting her as of now.

So...Kissing? Yeah. About that. Again...Zui had no idea what the fuck she was doing. Hell, she wasn't even sure what the fuck you were suppose to do...or even if that was kissing. For all she knew it could be some kind of kinky sex shit that she had no clue about. No, her mind was pretty sure that this was kissing. She felt his arms wrap around her waist and she couldn't help but...like it? A lot actually. This whole experience was pretty damn good so far. She couldn't stop though, she didn't know if she was suppose to stop. Zui kinda just kept kissing him. Not unlocking her arms that had snaked around his neck. Did...she like Steele in that way? She wasn't entirely sure about anything right now. She was pretty sure she was one of those drunks who got their feelings mixed up. Heck, her emotions and feelings were always mixed up. Leading her down one stupid path and up another. She wasn't really entirely sure why it happened. Why she couldn't stay WITH ONE EMOTION at the needed time instead of eight hundred other ones that kept screaming at her. Maybe those were thoughts. She did have a lot of them. She wanted to sigh and run a hand through her hair but she was sorta preoccupied with kissing someone right now, not that she mind. This kissing thing was going kinda...good. Phineas would kill them though. Holy shit, her brother would have a shit fit. She could see him screaming now about it. But he couldn't find out. She wouldn't remember this...He wouldn't remember this right? Hopefully. They were (well she was) pretty damn drunk. With all the drinking she had done she was pretty sure she wouldn't remember anything. Seeing as she had trouble remembering things when she was not even close to being this drunk.

Disappointment. That's what she felt when he pulled away from her. She took a breath though, not realizing that she kinda needed it. But she looked up at him, wondering if she did something right, or something wrong. Or if he was going to say something about it. She watched as he leaned in again, she took that as she did something good and leaned forward a little pressing her lips against his, she felt his hands move as they settled around her waist. She wondered what would happen if she started talking again. Zui had a habit of talking a lot when she was drunk or well on her way to being very very drunk. She usually spoke about nothing but today was something different as she spilled the one thing that no one knew about her....It was scary for her and made her shut right up. She was not ready to say anything else about it. She couldn't. She felt like she would be betraying her own....mind or something. Zui nodded as he spoke and kissed her cheek. She just leaned on him again, closing her eyes. "Okay." She answered quietly. She wasn't exactly sure how awkward it would be now as she opened her eyes to look up at him then looked down at her feet. Zui wasn't exactly sure what to say. Well...What the fuck do you say? Why was she thinking so much. Drunks weren't suppose to think this much...Well, her kind of drunk. She didn't want to ruin this moment though,so she kept her mouth close...That was the best idea.

[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/blockquote]as we watch[/font][/size][/i]
L I K E- -I T ’ S- -A- -M O V I E[/font]

STATUS, finished
TAGGED, steele
WORDS, 1017
MUSE, “red alert,” falling in reverse.
NOTES, blah.[/size][/color]

i come alive with you

[/font][/size][/i]
whadduuup! well, this template was made by monica !
at caution to the wind. if you take off this credit then i
won’t hesitate to send my pack of mutant ninja turtles
to attack you with blunt sporks :3 either that or i’ll go
all anikan skywalker on your ass. lyrics from the song
“legends” by madina lake. check them out, they=love.[/font][/right][/color]

[*STEELE LEVI WILSON!]

Steele wasn't sure of what to make of her reaction. She didn't pull away, she just went along with it. Steele didn't mind that part one bit, but the fact that she was still very drunk made him feel even more guilty than ever. But just like her, he didn't stop. He just kept kissing her. It had been awhile since he's kissed someone and actually felt like there was a slight connection. Even though Steele wasn't sure about this one, he wanted there to be, so it was there. He held her close to his body, closer than he had ever before. It was strange, this connection they were both sharing. Steele wasn't sure if it was temporary or permanent, but for now he was just living in the moment. Zui had been threw a lot more than Steele could ever imagine. He remembered the night his father came to claim him after thirteen years of living in peace and how traumatic that had been for him to go from a loving home to a hell hole. His father never cared about Steele, he just wanted the money that came with. He tried to erase that evil thought in his mind, failing miserably until he looked down at Zui standing there peacefully in his arms. The thought immediately started to fade and he was back to where he had been before. She had done a pretty good job at keeping his mind distracted. Here he was, standing with probably the most gorgeous girl in his arms. Zui was really pretty, Steele had never realized before, and he couldn't get over the fact now.

When he departed for a brief moment, it was reluctant. He immediately came back, caressing her lips again with his. He felt that maybe things were finally looking up for him. Zui wasn't exactly the girl Steele thought he'd be interested in. Mostly because she was the sister of his best friend, the closest thing he had to a brother. Though he should be disgusted by practically kissing his sister, he wasn't. The thought only made things more interesting. He had no intention of kissing her until a few moments ago, and now he was glad he did. He knew that Phineas would kill him for coming over here and putting moves on her like this while she was drunk, but at the same time it wasn't like he was forcing her to kiss him back or anything. Steele was a bit buzzed, but fully aware of what he was doing. He wished he would just let it be, and not to think too hard about what was going on, but it was just like him to be a serious drunk. He never got a break from being the good guy, always pleasing other people to help them coup with their stressful life, and even if this were the case where she was using him as a distraction from thinking about and worrying about things, he wouldn't be offended. Maybe a little pissed, but nothing he can't get over within a day. He knew that the possibility of this happening again was slim to none, Zui had other guys interested in her, others who would do a hell of a lot better than Steele for her boyfriend.

Still, he was here now, here for her to hold onto. She must be an emotional drunk, Steele hadn't remembered her brother ever mentioning his sister being emotional, though Steele also knew she was a bit emotional whilst sober, well he assumed since she covered it up so well with her anger. Steele was pretty good about reading emotions and being able to decipher what exactly they were feeling. He only had a slight hunch before about Zui, but after hearing her tragic story, it turned out to be accurate. So he didn't mind standing here, holding her and keeping her from causing harm to herself and others. He would stand here all night if he had to. It didn't matter to him, he was just the puppet for her to use until she's able to control it. It must have been tough for her, even while drunk to tell a story like that, and Steele was going to make sure she's one hundred percent better before he leaves. Even if he is forced to spend the night, it was a small price to pay to make her feel more at ease. He was here for her, and he hoped that she would remember in the future.

At a time like this, for once Steele didn't know what to say. He wanted to comfort her with words, but there was nothing to say that could make her feel better. The only thing he could do was hold her so she wouldn't fall. He kissed her once more, to ensure that he was there, whether it was a friendly or romantic one, that didn't matter to him anymore. Sure he would have loved for it to be romantic so he could be the prince to save her and they'd live happily ever after, just like all those silly chick flicks he's seen, he wanted to live one. But the sad truth was there was no such thing as a happy ending. As much as Steele wanted Zui to find her happy ending, he couldn't help but have this feeling he wasn't it, that she needed him as friend more than anything. He respected that, the sad realization was true, but that didn't mean they couldn't cuddle to make each other feel good. "It's going to be okay. Nobody is going to harm you, not while I'm around." Steele softly spoke.

NOTES boy was that a bad post. sorry x.xWORDS 952
TAGGED ZUI OUTFIT LOOK AT PICTURE
CREDIT BY HEY BAYBAY !? AT CAUTION !

[*ZUI NIXON PHOENIX!]

- - - - - - ’cause our lives are

[/font]

going up in flames ! - - - - - -[/font][/center]

She didn't know what the fuck she was doing, or that she was suppose to be doing this. Good thing she probably wasn't going to remember it later. She hoped so, it would be embarrassing if he didn't and she did although she was pretty sure she wasn't going to though. Hopefully, she wasn't and if he remembered and she didn't....she would be sorta embarrassed...that she had kissed him. Zui didn't go around and pucker them up...ever...well maybe when she was like four but that was about it. Four years olds never thought about what they were doing...Maybe Zui had the mentality of a four year old when she was drunk it would make sense to her at least. But they were kissing and he held her closer and right about now her mind wasn't doing anything. Zui wasn't exactly sure if this was suppose to be...Did she like him? She wasn't exactly sure about anything or that if she liked him like that. Yeah, Steele was a great friend. One of the best ones next to Amanda and Jona. She felt like she was calmer though than before which was pretty big for Zui. She felt comfortable though that she was in someone's arms right now. Zui bit down on her lower lip though. She wondered if this whole thing would be happening if she didn't make those stupid choices she did because she was bored. She sighed softly as she stood there in his arms. She looked up at him for a moment before looking back down to the ground. Her mind kept coming with thoughts she didn't want there. She didn't know if she was just confused or drunk but she was pretty sure it had to be one of them right?


It didn't hit her that she wanted him back to kissing her till he started kissing her again., Her mind was making no sense to her and she forgot to care as she kissed back. Would her brother kill her for this? Probably, he wouldn't kill him as much as he'd kill her. He always told her that making out with the band members or crew was not the best idea, considering she didn't make out or kiss anyone. This was going to be scary if he ever found out. She would be freaking out if she thought there was a possibility but she was pretty sure that neither of them would tell Phineas about this. Steele was too nice to get angry at though, especially with Phin because well he was like Phin's BFF. Yeah, so this felt strange, she did look up to Steele like a third brother....Since she really never talked to her older brother and Phin was her younger brother (by four fucking minutes and she still teased him every moment she got) But, still. She was too drunk to care about that though, which was probably a bad thing...seeing as she never had that much control when she was drunk. Oh god, what if things got...like...hotter and...she did other stuff. Her mind wasn't really processing these thoughts either...But she trusted Steele. She just didn't trust herself in this situation as much as she wanted to. She wondered what would happen after this...would he stay here or would he leave. She honestly, didn't feel like being alone tonight in case of nightmares coming back to haunt her in her sleep like they always did. That was something she couldn't stop at all.

Honestly if you were to ask Zui how she was feeling she wouldn't telling you anything...or she would just say fine...Or through a chair at you. It really depended on what the hell you did to her. She never expressed her feelings unless it was in the form of violence to anyone. That was just how she was and she was fine with it because hey, Zui was always like that. Always super violent and always a bit of a bitch. Was there a part of her that wished that she was never like that? Yeah actually, she wished she could just say what she felt but she just incorporated it in her music. While everyone thought River wrote the songs but she didn't. It was all Zui, her words and everything. Her sister just sang them. She knew some of the songs Jonathen wrote. She normally fell in love with those ones because of certain reasons she didn't let her mind get into. She wondered how different the situation would be if it was him instead of Steele. Fuck, there went her mind again, thinking about things that were long in the past. She pushed the thoughts from her head again and closed her eyes. All the alcohol made her a tiny bit tired okay that was a lie. She was really tired actually, her head was starting to hurt and her eyes felt heavy. Shit, she didn't want to fall asleep. No no no, she didn't. She wanted to stay awake and write more music.


Zui didn't want this whole Trey thing to get to her. Actually, she wondered if it was the whole Trey and James thing put together that equaled her drunk off her ass and currently kissing her photographer. She wasn't technically sure if that was the best remedy but whatever it was over and done...That's when something else hit her. That was technically her first kiss. Holy shit. Her mind was rather well, trying to sort things out like it had been doing this whole time when it finally processed what was happening. Steele kissed her again and she wasn't...hesitant to kiss back or anything. She just didn't know how she felt about it. Damn, what the hell was she going to do about this. Zui smiled as she felt much better at the words he said. " Thanks, it means a lot to me." She told him, smiling. "Can you stay tonight? I don't want to sleep alone. she muttered rather sheepishly as she walked away from him and sat down on the bed, putting her elbow on her thigh and leaning forward with her chin in the palm of her hand like the thinker statue because that's exactly what she was doing.

[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/blockquote]as we watch[/font][/size][/i]
L I K E- -I T ’ S- -A- -M O V I E[/font]

STATUS, finished
TAGGED, steele
WORDS, 1017
MUSE, “red alert,” falling in reverse.
NOTES, blah.[/size][/color]

i come alive with you

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whadduuup! well, this template was made by monica !
at caution to the wind. if you take off this credit then i
won’t hesitate to send my pack of mutant ninja turtles
to attack you with blunt sporks :3 either that or i’ll go
all anikan skywalker on your ass. lyrics from the song
“legends” by madina lake. check them out, they=love.[/font][/right][/color]